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I am 22 yrs outdated, dwelling on my have with my partner, and my dad continue to trys to management what i do.


I am 22 decades outdated, residing on my individual with my partner, and my father even now trys to command what i do.



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37 replies on “I am 22 yrs outdated, dwelling on my have with my partner, and my dad continue to trys to management what i do.”

Being baptized is bs anyway because it’s some creep dunking you in regular water. It means nothing. I’d be suggesting to him to take a hike and I’d be unfriending/blocking him from social media. Social media and family do not mix well together. I don’t know why you tolerate this behavior.

Why are you even engaging with this nonsense? If you’re old enough to be married, you’re old enough to tell your father to butt out.

I’m not trying to be a dick here but it might be time to just stop capitulating to these demands. You ARE an adult, you don’t HAVE to defend any of your “likes” to him.

You are just as much a problem if you cater to his whims. Tell him to back off and worry about his own facebook.

This is definitely sucky OP, but he’s doing it because obviously it works. Something as silly as Facebook likes are none of his business, why are you giving in to this?

I mean, from the screenshot this isn’t ‘trying’ he *is* controlling you to a certain degree. Why do you let him? If you live with your husband on your guys own, why would you capitulate to his demands? Is there something he’s holding over you or you think he would take away if you didn’t? And is it worth having him control aspects of your life?

Seems like you need to come to terms with your relationship with your father and stand up for yourself and not let him control you. You’re an adult now.

And you capitulated to his demand. Did you intentionally like it? If so own it and say “yes dad I did”

I mean, from the screenshot this isn’t ‘trying’ he *is* controlling you to a certain degree. Why do you let him? If you live with your husband on your guys own, why would you capitulate to his demands? Is there something he’s holding over you or you think he would take away if you didn’t? And is it worth having him control aspects of your life?

Seems like you need to come to terms with your relationship with your father and stand up for yourself and not let him control you. You’re an adult now.

You need to stop entertaining this kind of thing. He tries to control what you do because he DOES control what you do. You need boundaries. It’s okay to limit what he can see on your social media, it’s okay to block him. It’s okay to say “no, I will not do that”. If he harasses you about something, ignore him. Do not respond. Block him for a few days if you have to.

He tries and succeeds. It’s hard, but you need to voice your opinions. They are yours for a reason. Don’t capitulate for Christmas gifts!

Your letting him control you by doing what he says…to control you. So..stop engaging. Sic your husband on him. But stand up for yourself more than this come on

He doesn’t “try”, he *is* controlling you because you let him. You also mentioned he’s transphobic and you just blindly agreed with him. Not wanting his child to die doesn’t make him the savior you think he is. Most parents would have done what he did. It’s not an excuse to treat you or anyone else like garbage.

You need therapy and to learn how to stand up for yourself. I doubt you’ll listen to my comment because you seem set on letting this man walk all over you till he dies, but maybe give it some thought if you feel like being reasonable.

He doesn’t try and control what you do. He literally controlled you here.

You have agency. Do what you think is best based on your own opinion.

Why are you still doing what he tells you? Especially something this stupid?

He doesn’t try and control you he does fully control you.

Huh… and you just rolled on over for him didn’t you? Seems like maybe you should just… not do that.

I know you’re getting a lot of comments telling you to just not do it or not to give in to him. While that is a step along the journey, I understand how hard it is to resist someone who may have abused you in the past, no matter how ridiculous or controlling the request is. I’m proud of you for at least acknowledging that it is ridiculous.

He’s not *trying* to control you’re life, he is actively controlling it, and you’re letting him. Rather than set boundaries, you let him talk to you like you’re a child. You’re an adult. It’s time to start setting healthy boundaries around yourself. Your parent shouldn’t be telling you what you can and can’t like on your social media, accident or not. Unless you’re afraid of honor killings or something, this is on you to change.

Well he’s not “trying” to control you. He is controlling you since you’re agreeing to “unlike” something which is ridiculous. Just say no.

*”Can you go back & “unlike” it?”*

Can you go back and fuck off?

*”I’d suggest you do that”*

I’d suggest you fuck off.

—–

You shouldn’t bend to his will, OP.

I would like to suggest some non religious based counseling or therapy. You can see something isn’t right with the relationship you have with your father.

You don’t owe a parent anything for raising and providing for you. Daughters often get guilted by religious parents into being obedient.

You owe your adult life to yourself and the family you make.

A quick check of OP’s profile gives context that they don’t seem to have shared here, seems their rationale is that they feel as though they owe their life to their dad as apparently they were extremely prematurely born and supposedly the Doctors took some convincing to save OP (let’s set that part aside for now). They go on to say they “just want to keep the peace” until he kicks the bucket.

Now, with that context established, I still agree with everyone here OP, even if the detail about the doctors being reluctant to save you is true (which would be grossly unethical imo), that doesn’t give your dad the right to make you a verbal punching bag, _nothing_ does, and if they’re acting like this you’re under no obligation to put up with it. Either tell him to knock it off and stand up for yourself, or if he doesn’t, stop talking to him. Don’t fall for anything he might say like what you told us about feeling like you owe him, YOU. DO. NOT. Keeping your child alive isn’t even the bare minimum to being a parent, and it does not make it right for him to push you around like this.

I get that it will probably be hard, seeing as you seem to be pretty “deep in the mud” so to speak right now, but you must realize this isn’t a healthy relationship when even you are just waiting for him to keel over to be done with it all. It will make healing easier the sooner you start

OP, I know these comments have turned into a whirlwind of bickering about how you should be responding, and quite honestly it probably feels like all of these people are no better than your father on telling you what to do. This is part of what your fathers controlling conditioning has done to you.

I came here to see why you gave in to his demand, but I think I see why. If you’d like to vent, feel free to reach out to me via direct message. Even if you don’t, just know that the people in these comments mean well, even if they can’t feel the unease and dread you may feel when you read them.

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